One more day, one more week

So, they asked Jon in a round about way for an extension -- something along the lines of, 'is it absolutely critical that we give you answer by July 1?. Oh dear, oh dear. Jon has given them another week, which at least allows him to go and do what he has to do and doesn't leave it so late for me.
We bought a sofa yesterday. It's a second-hand one from a young British couple who both work in re-insurance and are leaving the island. We got a pretty good deal, getting a sofa, two coffee tables, a hairdryer and some timers to work with lamps etc, a CD-radio alarm clock and a framed poster for $650. They are all really good quality. Now we just need a bed! There's a great website here called e-moo, where people advertise things they qant to sell, but the beds always seem to go so quickly.
I think there is a rat on our roof. I was lying in bed this morning and heard some rather load scratching. It was a bit worrying, but once I realised it wasn't coming from inside, i was a bit happier.
We found a short-cut last night down to the railway track, which is a path running from one side of the island to the other that used to be home to the old railway before they foolishly got rid of it (Bermuda has no railway now and massive transport problems). Anyway, as it's closed to cars and only used by pedestrians, bikes and motorbikes, it's great for walking and jogging along. I can get through a little path to the track, which runs along the sea, and went for a little jog along there this morning.
Bean was extremely active at around 5.30, more than usual, but I think the jog had a calming effect.
No more news at the moment. I'll keep you posted. The apartment is looking good. The floors are nearly sanded and it's almost ready.
Love to you all
Han
xxx

A rum bed; be a drum

However you look at it, it's the same nonsense just put another way.
How can a place be so beautiful, but so ugly below the surface?
There was some good news: allegedly, Msrs BSF (oh, there are a lot of things that could stand for) are going to ask us for an extension of seven days to our deadline of July1 to which Jon seems to think it's only fair to agree. The captain has said he won't take Jon on the delivery because at least he thinks my delivery is more important. Jon has a job interview next week. Allegedly we can move into the renovated place this weekend. We lost a bed today that we really needed to buy on a second-hand website because Jon was too busy over-seeing some idiotic lazy boys who seem to take more time doing things than if he did himself. The Bean is proving to be a little boxer...and my rock at the moment on this god forsaken island.
Good luck to Mum and Dad and Alex for all their challenges in the next week
xxx

Thank you

To the two wonderful, fantastic, kind soon-to-be grandmothers (I hope this doesn't make you feel old- by the way Hilary what is Bean going to call you?), thank you so much. As I said, we should know more this weekend, but if I could hug you both now I would for offering to come out here, I would. In the absence of that, I'm sending a virtual hug and lots of love.
H & B
xxx

Which comes first...the Bean or the boat?

Mmmm...where do I start?
First, thanks to everyone for the birthday wishes that I received electronically this morning when I opened my email and when I checked the replies to my last posting. Inefficiency is so endemic on this island that it spreads to the postal system, so I am still waiting for the delivery of the mailed birthday cards, but thank you in advance.
I had a good birthday. Jon took me out for breakfast at a little restaurant in Dockyard and then we went to a nearby beach for a little bit, where we went for a swim (Uncle Al will be proud, I went in the water although I did see some tiny fish). It was beautiful weather and the sea was gorgeous and quite warm. After that we went for a drink at one of the hotels at another beach and in the evening we went out for a lovely Thai meal at a restaurant in the capital, Hamilton. The food was wonderful and I treated myself to a glass of wine, which tasted all the better for being such a rarity. It's amazing how long I can make a glass last these days!
Last week was the hundredth Newport-Bermuda yacht race, the highlight of the sailing calendar here and an opportunity for obnoxiously expensive people from the States and the island to flash their cash in the form of the boats they sailed over. The yacht club in Hamilton hosted many of the boats and so it was awash with colourful flags being flown by the different vessels and more money than sense. It was pretty amazing seeing some of the sailing boats, many of which must have been worth more than a million dollars and there were some really beautiful ones. In celebration of the centennial, the U.S. Coastguard's sail training vessel, the Eagle, had sailed over. So that was moored opposite the Thai restaurant - a very impressive looking ship, measuring almost 300 feet, about three times bigger than the sloop will be. Princess Anne spent the weekend on the island and apparently made a visit to the Eagle. What a shame that the Foundation wasn't organised enough to know about the visit of the Eagle when it is supposed to be building Bermuda's only sail training vessel and one of a handful in the world.
Yesterday, we did some gardening for the nuns as a kind of rental payment, although I didn't really do that much as my back was hurting quite a lot and I'm now finding it almost impossible to bend over. We started off being quite sparing with the weeds and just picking out those that were obviously not flowers and then we got a bit excited and pulled out everything else that might possibly be a weed, which was apparently the right thing to do because by the time we had finished they had some nice evenly spaced geraniums in the flower beds and not much else. I managed to persuade Jon to take me down to the pub so I could watch the second half of the England game. I think it's funny how I have more interest in football than he does. My commiserations go to the Incredible Halk, as I really though England were very over-rated -- even if Beckham's goal was good -- and Ecuador played extremely well. Next week will be interesting as Bermuda has a very large Portuguese and English population, and the rival flags are apparently already flying.
We spent a lovely afternoon sitting in the garden outside the cottage and then I went for a jalk -- jog/walk, which is the only thing I seem to be managing at the moment -- while Jon went to finish off some work. We had another social event at the home of Malcolm, the executive director of the Foundation, last night when he got a load of educational people together to pick the brains of Jon and Chris about the sail training projects that the Foundation is supposed to be running. I was quite pleasantly surprised as I met a lovely couple called Marion and Rob. He is head of one of the top schools on the island, in fact the one that the Douglas family send their son to. They were very down to earth as only the English can be and Marion gave me loads of great advice about settling in, and Rob, who used to play for Derby County FC in his youth, regaled us with entertaining stories about how he manages to puncture the pretentiousness of some people here in Bermuda.
Although we had a lovely weekend, it was somewhat overshadowed by some rather unfortunate news, that really makes me question if I want to be here, but more than anything upsets me. Jon and Chris met with Alan (the chairman) and Malcolm from the Foundation on Friday to try and finally bash out launch and delivery dates for the sloop. It now appears that the launch date is set for August 13, but for some reason that I can't understand and that I can only put down to the immense inefficiency and the worst possible timing, they have scheduled the delivery for between 15-30 September. Ring any bells.......?
Bean is due on September 25 -- three months yesterday -- and bang in the middle of the bloody delivery. So, there's a 99 percent (or pretty high) probability that Jon won't be there for the birth, which is something that is so important to me. Before anyone tells me I am over-reacting, I know people who go on tours of duty in Iraq or Afghanistan often miss the births of their children, I know some people never even know their parents, I know Freddie Flintoff missed his child's delivery because he was captaining the England side, I know there are single mothers all over the world, but I am disapointed, because yet again it seems like the bastards here have conspired against us. I know I should count my blessings, but unfortunately - much as a conversation with Malcolm tipped Jon over the edge a couple of weeks ago and made him pack his bags and nearly leave the island, - this was the proverbial straw that broke my camel's back. Jon and I had planned for him to be there at the birth and I think that was part of the disappointment because if we hadn't have planned it, it might not have been so bad.
So, we are left with yet another situation of uncertainty from this Devil's Isle, as this place was first, and should still be, known.
As we see it, there are a few options. The July 1 deadline we gave them for having the visa sorted is fast approaching. If nothing appears by this date, we have to make a decision as to whether or not we stay. If we stay, I could come back to England and have the baby there, and Jon will have to fly out to the UK as soon as the boat is delivered, which could technically be around the due date. Then Bean and I could fly back to Bermuda a few weeks later. Or, we could have the baby in Bermuda, but then I risk being by myself at the birth, unless I can persuade someone to come and keep me company.....any offers?
Neither option is great as it means that if we are in the UK, Bean and I won't see Jon for several weeks, but if I stay in Bermuda, I risk being by myself and having a hard few final weeks, as Jon will be in the States from the start of August.
If we don't take the job, we will be able to come back to the UK, but we will have to find something else. There is something in the pipeline, which I don't want to jinx so I won't go into detail. I think more than anything, I am fed up because this is maing me wonder where the hell does this stop?
I believe in being professional, which Jon is being, but he seems to be the only one being so. Grrrrrrrrr. I thought I had experienced incompetence, inefficiency and bureaucracy before, but this is the most spectacular litany of errors that I have ever known and it has squashed all my faith in the project.
It looks like the renovations might be finished in the newt few days, although I am not holding my breath. Luckily the nuns have given us an extension in the cottage and we can stay there until Friday.
The men are supposed to be coming in today to do the floor sanding, so hopefully we can move in here by the end of the week, at around the time that we give them our decision. I discovered the other day that we are not going to have a washing machine in our apartment and may have to share one with the engineer, who is going to be living downstairs....marvellous, but what did I expect?
Oh well, the sun is shining, so that's nice, and we get to do some laundry today, which will mean we don't have to walk around in scabby clothes. Life's little luxuries.......
Oh, and I discovered something that would make my Nanna (Mum's mum) very pleased. There's a M&S here and not only do they sell proper pants and bras, but they also have reasonably priced wine and turkish delights in the food section. Perhaps there is a God!!

Of insects and things.....

Jon has just gone off to work and I am sitting in the little cottage, writing this on my computer so I can save it and put it on my blog later today.
I really can’t get over how hard Jon has been working. He starts at 7.30, along with the rest of those he is working with and after they stop at around four invariably, he goes on for several more hours. This means that in the evenings he is exhausted as soon as he has eaten and falls asleep really early. It doesn’t do much for our social life, but then I was worried that I was going to be the one going to bed early.
Today the manual labour is over for a few days as Chris, the captain of the sloop, arrives. He is here for a few days, during which I am sure there will be no end of meetings for Jon to attend and I am hoping that it is limited to the one that is scheduled for Saturday, not only because it’s my birthday, but also because Jon desperately needs a break.
It’s 7.30 in the morning and the frog chorus – the thing I described as insects – yesterday is continuing. It rained last night and it seems quite fresh this morning after the steamy heat of yesterday, where the humidity and temperature were both in the eighties.
I had a rather unpleasant experience during the night, although luckily it wasn’t pregnancy-related. I woke up to something that sounded like scratching in the roof and felt something small hit the bed, but figured it was probably a bit of bark or something that had got dislodged from the traditional beamed ceiling. A few minutes later, I got hit full force in the head by the evil cockroach that had been doing the scratching. Well, because I was half asleep and because I was scared, I screamed – waking up both Jon and Bean and no doubt terrifying the cockroach. Jon managed to catch it - by this point it was across the other side of the room - and kill it, putting it outside – where this morning it seems to have become the magnificent feast of about a thousand tiny ants….nice.
Needless to say, it took me rather a long time to get back to sleep after this 2am episode, because I thought all of his friends might be in the roof and because the experience had woken up Bean, who decided to treat Mummy to the full force of a foetus’ kicking skills. Jon managed to go back to sleep pretty quickly which is a bit of a shame as I had been assuring him of Bean’s kicking prowess since I arrived and he has so far only experienced a rather below par example.
It’s just over a week to go until the cut-off date of July 1 that we set for a visa decision and it probably won’t surprise anyone to learn that things don’t seem to be progressing at all. I don’t know that the actual current state of affairs is, as Jon hasn’t really been had any news from the Foundation since the upset a couple of weeks ago, but I am hoping things become a little clearer now that Chris is coming. We have a dinner that we have to go to tonight at Malcolm's house, which will no doubt be the highlight of the week, and we may find out more then as he was the one supposed to sorting out the visa issues, as director of the Foundation. However, Jon really doesn’t think things will be any clearer by July 1, so we are left in that situation again of deciding what to do. We both feel incredibly torn. I feel slightly wound up by the fact that we originally said June 1 and then July 1 and no progress has been made, but equally I don’t really want to put my foot down and say ‘that’s it; I’ve had enough. We’re out of here’, and leave us with nothing. But, it is taking the mickey a little bit.
It does give the impression of being a bit of a banana republic, which in some ways is good because it means we could probably stay here and things will probably get sorted and we will probably get the visa at some stage in the next three years. But, in many other ways, the incompetence that we have witnessed shouldn't even have a place in a third world country, let alone somewhere that seems to think it’s superior to many first world countries. And so, the uncertainty continues.
My burgeoning belly is going to put a definitive end to it at some stage in the next few weeks. Even though I don’t look as pregnant as I am, most airlines won’t let you fly after 28 weeks without a doctor’s note saying you are fit and healthy and with your due date on…which gives me precisely 10 days, or until July 3.
Well, I can probably get by with another week, or at a push until 30 weeks, but then it starts getting a bit silly. So, we need to know with certainty and not with a ‘oh, the visa will come through don’t worry’ type of island attitude.
It wouldn’t be so hard if there weren’t a lot of really great things about this place. The apartment that we would be living in is very cool and right outside that is where the sloop is going to be moored. The weather is lovely a lot of the time, but my favourite thing is the water. It is the most incredible colour I have ever seen: a combination of teal, azure and turquoise with pockets of cobalt blue and peppermint green and it so clear. I haven’t swum in it yet, partly because of my phobia of fish – something I am going to have to get over if we end up living here – and because it was still a little on the chilly side last time I was here, but it is incredibly relaxing just sitting there looking at it, diving into its depths in my imagination or dreaming of us taking off in one of the beautiful sailing boats that course its waters around the island.
Well, had better go and make myself useful. Sorry to those of you, Mum included, who couldn't make out the ultra-sound. It does show Bean's face, I promise.
xxx

Bean there, done that

Here is the Bean at 26 weeks...taken on Monday. It's not great quality, but it's of the face and you can make out the eyes, nose and mouth, which are part of the oval-shaped thing in the top half of the pic. Jon says Bean has his nose...am not sure!
Well, I am now in sunny Bermuda, where I am currently being serenaded by a mix of rather dodgy music for the tourists to the Dockyard and the sound of someone drilling holes in the bathroom wall.
As you may have gathered, the Bean and I arrived here safely and I have just checked the comments to my previous posting and found that you've all come out of the woodwork. Thank you so much. It has made my day!! Welcome to new posters Mia and Lorena. By the way, Fairy G, you can breathe a sigh of relief: they are indeed my earrings in the picture of the leaving party. For those not in the know, Auntie Fred (aka. new hero in Brazil after scoring last week's late match goal) has a hatred of holes in ears and I have a tendency not to wear earrings.
Anyhow, as I was saying...we arrived here safely and on time after a decent plane trip. Although Big Cuz will sympathise when I say I may as well have lived in the toilet for the journey. Luckily, I was in the bulkhead, so I had lots of space and was close to afore-mentioned facility. But despite the extra space, by the time I got to Bermuda, my ankles looked like they belonged to someone who was twenty stone heavier...not nice, and the first time I have had this horrendous pregnancy-related oedema. Luckily, I am back to normal today!
I managed to persuade a nice person at Continental Airlines to get someone in Newark airport to help me with my bags, but this was only after I had to suffer the mortification of being wheeled through the airport in a wheelchair. Apparently, the airline won't arrange to help you with your bags if you don't have wheelchair. Well, then I realised this was actually quite a good ploy and I might try it again sometime as not you get to beat everyone through immigration and customs, get whisked to your gate and don't get treated as much like a terrorist as you might if you walked through without a wheelchair.
Jon was at the airport to meet me and Bean and the good news is, he has found somewhere for us to live this week. We are actually staying in a really sweet little cottage, which is part of a trust run by nuns. We will probably be staying there for a week as they are due to get someone in to sand the floors at the place Jon is renovating. The house looks great and it really is a transformation from the last time I saw it and apart from the plumbing and the sanding and a couple of other minor things, it is almost ready to move into.... Jon has been working incredibly hard and has lost weight, although I don't know if that is because of the stress, work or not eating enough. But, otherwise, it is lovely to see him and I am really happy we are all together. It makes me feel like it will be much better now.
The cottage where we are staying is in very large grounds, and when I was lying in bed last night -- trying in vain to get comfy yet again -- I could hear loads of little insects, a real night chorus, that made me feel like I was back in the jungle. Unfortunately, there are a few other jungle type creatures around as well and I had a bit of a fight with a cockroach, trying to persude it to go down the toilet. Its mate was in the bath when I woke up this morning and then the pesky persistent little thing decided to come back in the door after I had thrown it outside. I saw off another one sniffing around my suitcase this morning too. It's a good thing almost three years in Peru have made me accustomed to 'cucarachas' as they call them there. Well, I suppose there are worse things and as long as they don't come and visit me in bed, I will be happy.
Well, this has been a fairly long post, so I will sign off now.
Love to you all and hopefully I'll post again soon.
Hannah
xxx

Deepest darkest Peru

Well, D-day has come and in less than three hours I will be in my taxi on the way to the airport in Lima. Today has been a good day and I feel positive about moving on. I went to the doctor today for a final check-up before leaving Peru and he said Bean was doing really well, now weighing 813 g, which is apparently about 1.81bs. I've put on between 4 and 5 kilos so far, which is apparently good as well. After a trip to hairdressers and a manicure and pedicure - well, a girls got to do what a girls got to do, and it is a lot cheaper here than in Bermuda!, I went to Larcomar for lunch at one of my old faves, Vivaldino. Looking out over the grey sea offset by its bright white waves, it felt like the last three years had gone very quickly, while at the same time, I have learnt so much and changed a great deal. On the way back to Mark's to finish packing, I found something that really made my day....a real Peruvian Paddington Bear. I couldn't resist buying it for Bean, even though it was from one of the tourist shops. It's got a little duffel coat and a blue hat. I think it's quite appropriate that it's the first teddy I have bought Bean and that it's the first time I have seen Paddington in Peru and that it happens to be my last day here because Dad and I had talked about trying to start importing them into Peru when he was here, so I think that makes it even more like serendipity.
Well, I had better go and try and re-distribute the weight between my two bags, because at the moment one is a lot heavier than the other.
In the meantime, love to all my friends in Peru. I will miss you very much. I may not have as frequent access to the internet once I get to Bermuda, but I will try and post as frequently as possible and keep you up to date with all the goings-on.
Hannah
xxx

My last night in Lima

Before anyone tells me some of the pictures are the wrong way around, I know and am sorry....but here are the photos from my despedida -- leaving do -- this evening. It was a lovely evening and am very tired and a wee bit emotional now, so I will leave the 'eloquent' (ambitious, I know) comments for another time. Suffice to say, I've been very lucky to have such wonderful friends here in Lima and I will miss them ever so much, and thanks to Sally for the putting on the gathering and for buying Bean the lovely baby clothes.
Buenas noches a todos (on my last night in Lima)

To sleep, perchance to dream...

Well, it was about time I did something pretentious like quote Willy Waggledagger.....
Sleeping through the night is most definitely a thing of the past: something I certainly didn't appreciate until it was too late. And, I've been warned it will only get worse. An American friend of mine reckons that God makes you get up several times during the night to go to the toilet while your pregnant to prepare you for the middle of the night tears, tantrums and feeding sessions of babyhood. While I'm not sure about that, recently, I've not only had to fend with several nocturnal toilet trips, but with the fact that I simply cannot seem to get comfy. A growing stomach and the fact that I cannot sleep on my front, nor -- I am advised -- on my back, mean that I have to sleep on my side, like a foetus -- although I can assure you Bean is getting more sleep than me.
What's more, they (I have no real idea who they is, but they deserve as much stick as they get) suggest you should sleep on your left side, which is pretty damn painful with sciatica.
Well, I shouldn't grumble. Going to bed is, rather sadly, my favourite part of the day at the moment: partly because I've been looking forward to seeing Jon so much that ever sleep means one less sleep and partly because this week I have been extraordinarily tired. They (them again) say your subconscious concerns come to the fore when you are asleep and if that is the case, then I must be subconsciously fearing things like baby poo...I won't go into detail about the dream, suffice to say it was messy.
After I woke from that unpleasant experience (oh, I know the reality will be so much more pleasant...honest!), I lay there for a long time last night, listening to the sound of the ocean -- which is one of the real blessings about living here -- and thinking about baby names. For the record, we have a girl and a boy version, which are secret, and wondering if we had made the right choices...which now I am awake, I think we have.
I hope that Jon has managed to acquire some furniture for the place we will be staying in in Bermuda, because otherwise we might be in trouble. Another of the things that was keeping me awake last night was thinking how I could use the rugs and throws that I am taking with me to make into a bed, if we Jon didn't have any luck at the yard sale he was going to today. The Foundation is supposed to be furnishing the house, but I am sure it won't surprise anyone that that hasn't been done yet. Oh well, I'm sure it will be all fine and in the dim light of Lima morning, I actually managed to mentally design us quite a comfortable bed/mattress thing....which I am sure will so wonders for maintaining my current sleeping pattern.
I had a lovely chat with Mum on the phone today: the longest chat we have had in a long time, and then I went to the gym and managed to kill an hour by strolling on the cross-trainer and watching TV, without overdoing it (I promise). I've been too tired to run recently and think this may now be consigned to the post-baby pile of activities, although I know that I am likely to be even more tired, but hopefully not as heavy and not needing the toilet every five seconds when I bounce up and down.
Hal and I then met up for some lunch and had a great time (although he may tell you otherwise!) eating and chatting at our local, Arugula. It's great to have friends like Hal and Lorna and they've both been good mates to me and Jon. Now Lorna is back in the UK for a couple of months, Hal and I have been hanging out and doing what we do best -- generally talking nonsense!
On the way back from lunch, I stopped off at the Inca Market and bought some finger puppets for the Bean: 10 little knitted animals and birds, which I think we will have great fun playing with and were a bargain at less than 20 pence each.
It's Father's Day tomorrow and even though I disagree with quite how commercialised it is here in Peru -- the American influence, I assume -- it's exciting to think that this time next year Jon will be a Daddy...ok, I know it's a lot sooner, but that will be his first Father's Day. In the meantime, Happy Father's Day to my Dad....and thanks for being so fab.
Lots of love to you all.
Hannah
xxx

To clear up any confusion

Mark says the baby I am carrying in the photo looks more like Jon than me. So, just to clear up any confusion, my dark and hairy passenger is Aunt Lucy, of Paddington fame. And, as you can see, she's clearly enjoying getting back to her Peruvian roots!

Mixed feelings

This will be the second time I have left Peru 'for good'. Sally has been joking that I can't expect to get leaving presents every time I go! For me, this departure is bitter-sweet. The last time I left, I was heading off to Dubai, with great uncertainty and towards something that I was never convinced about.
This time I am heading into the unknown again. I am excited about this new chapter, really happy about Bean and being with Jon, but a little bit scared too. I will really miss Peru, but most of all the friends I have made here in almost three years. They are some of the closest friends of my adult life so far: an interesting, kind and close community that has helped me through some pretty tough times.
Peru is one of those countries that gets under your skin: that drives you nuts with its noise and bureaucracy and the lack of lateral thinking you encounter on a day-to-day basis, but it's also vibrant and fun and unpredictable, home to some of the best food I've ever encountered and some of my favourite places in the world.
Perhaps I would feel less scared about leaving Peru if Jon and I knew for sure that this visa application to Bermuda is going to work, and we will know by the start of July, but it feels like I am cutting the strings with Peru before I have even seen if there are any strings to hold onto anywhere else.
I don't know when I'll next be back in Peru, so for now I'll leave you with this rather unattractive picture of me trying to show Mark that I could figure out how the Peruvian women carry their babies!
Han
xxx

Twenty five weeks and thank you

Twenty-five weeks today and the Beanie Baby is growing at a startling pace. The hours of wake and sleep seem to be pretty regular now and although I still can't distinguish if it's an elbow, a knee, a hand or a foot that is bashing me, the kicks are pretty constant. Sleep seems to be a thing of the past. I just can't get comfortable and I guess my subconscious is kicking in every time I drift off, which means weird and wacky dreams. But, I am feeling happier and more relieved than I have been in a long time. I wanted to thank everyone for crossing all their fingers and toes and much more in the past few weeks. It's meant a lot and I really appreciate the postings on the blog. Hilary, I got the messages, so thanks....I'm glad I can keep you all up-to-date, and hope you will forgive the occasional grumpiness.
Jon and I spent a long time on messenger last night -- the longest in ages and I know he is feeling immensely relieved by the results of his meeting yesterday. We still need to keep our fingers crossed though and hope that they can pull off the visa issue by July 1.
Two other mentions: it seems the boat launch is going to be August 13, and -- phew, phew -- not on August 19th, the day of Sarah (Jon's sister's) wedding to Steve, which of course Jon wasn't going to miss for the world...and Happy Birthday to Sarah for today....I hope she has a great day and doesn't work too hard.
Twelve days until I'm in my thirtieth year.....what a terrifying thought! 105 days until Bean is due....exciting, but scary too!
Love to you all
H and B
xx

An unfinished story

Today has been a good day.
I scarcely want to believe it, but Bermuda has accepted Jon's ultimatum of July 1, he hasn't had to resign and I will be going over there on the 20th. Okay, okay, before I start celebrating too much, I know -- in the wise words of Ronan Keating -- 'Life is a rollercoaster' and things may well change in the coming twenty-four hours, let alone in the next few days, but I feel a massive sense of relief.
Aside from this news, today has been good for other reasons. I kicked it off with a great brekkie at the Marriott with Hal and Lorna and then went shopping for Bean and bought three great little overcoat/cardigans, embroidered with lovely Peruvian designs, plus a couple of little Peruvian hats and an Inka Kola t-shirt, with the logo of Peru's best-known drink. The tops are nice and warm and a couple of sizes, although they probably won't fit for a while. I also found a shop that sold some great t-shirts, all less than a pound and good for my expanding tummy. Then I found a couple of CDs from a range called first steps that introduce babies to a range of music, so this afternoon Bean and I have been listening to John Lennon, played on what sounds like triangles and another CD of classical music.
On my way back, I was truly exhausted, so stopped off at Starbucks, to have a rest. While I was there, there was an earth tremor, which while very short, felt pretty strong and I later found out it was a 4.2, but centred about thirty miles away.
Last night, I was feeling really down and went out to see the film, 'An Unfinished Life', with Robert Redford, Morgan Freeman and Jennifer Lopez of all people. Some say she was carried by two superior actors and I think that is probably the case, but the film was pretty good and the scenery was spectacular and in general it appealed to the Western admirer in me.
Well, Mark's girlfriend, Jana, and I are about to go and get some food. So, good night for now and sweet dreams. If anybody has any last minute Peruvian shopping requests, please let me know in the next couple of days.
Lots of love
Hannah
xxxx

Footballing prowess

Jelly Bean and I were very dedicated patriots this morning, getting up before eight to watch England's opening match in the World Cup. Now I might have done some football reporting in the past, but am not going to attempt to analyse the game, suffice to say that some of the best kicking of the 90 minutes was done by Bean. When I spoke with Fairy Godmother after the match, she joked that our baby might be born with football boots and after today's performance, I wouldn't be that surprised. JB woke up almost at the whistle and proceeded to welly me pretty constantly for most of the first half. And almost at the moment when he/she stopped kicking, England's game started going down hill rapidly. It was pretty funny.

The Bermuda Triangle

I feel like we've got nothing left to lose.
As I write this, I have just come off the phone with Jon, who has had one hell of a day.
It appears the immigration process for Bermuda has not advanced one iota since the forms went in more than two weeks ago and despite an agreement that the Foundation would go straight to the minister who could bypass the waiting process and issue the necessary visas because of the need to hurry our applications, this has not been done.
Today, Jon was reprimanded by the Foundation's executive director for not having sent off for a police record. We agreed five weeks ago we did not have time to do this because of the urgent nature of our application, because it would take at least two months and wouldn't be needed with the ministerial approach.
Jon and I spent a long time on the phone, after he had basically packed all his bags and decided to leave the island. We agreed he would talk to the Foundation's 'good cop' and tell him he was going to leave the island on Monday and then hope that the ministerial path would be followed and that if and when the visas were okayed, he could fly back to Bermuda.
This would allow us to 'regroup', as Jon put it, in London, where I would fly back to via New York on June 21, as I already had a flight to Newark and one to London that I could bring forward.
Well, this was desperately disappointing, but after a long conversation, I realised it was better to cut our losses now, especially as Jon is only going to continue having run-ins with the executive director, as the two of them don't see eye-to-eye. He promised me things would work out and we would be able to get something sorted in the UK and I trust him and agree with him on that and will support him, because I love him.
Well, fast forward several hours -- during which I went and opened my heart to Hal and Lorna (I don't know what I would have done without them during my time in Lima....it's wonderful to have such good friends) -- to now.
As I say, I have just spoken with Jon, who is currently in a camp bed in the rat-pit that he is renovating. He had a long chat with Alan, who desperately wants to keep Jon as part of the Foundation and is confident that the visa issue will get sorted and has said he will go the ministerial route this week.
Jon didn't mention what we had agreed that he would leave on Monday. He felt really guilty after we had agreed on this and he apparently forgot to bring it up in the conversation. This leaves me massively up in the air, as it does him, because we are back to the situation we were in before all today's heart ache and disappointment and reconciliation with the fact that Bermuda was no longer an option.
I am sure things will continue to change with startling pace, but at the moment, my plans to go back to Bermuda on June 20/21st are back on, although to be fair, if I didn't feel like this was out only option, I would gladly wipe my hands of the damn thing for ever. I know it could be great, but I have had enough. And, more than that I am trying to keep calm and not worry too much for the sake of the baby. I am looking after myself, and I don't want others to worry, but if you can keep your fingers and toes crossed for us, I'd appreciate it.
So, the legends about the Bermuda triangle are true. It will suck you up and mess you around and if you're very unlucky really screw up your life.
Bitter and twisted, moi?
I'm going to bed now....wishing you all a good night, sweet dreams and wishing England luck tomorrow.
xxxx

Shall I stay or shall I go?

Lorna and I went to this lovely arty shop today and had lunch and I treated myself to an early birthday present of a necklace with huayruro beads, which are Amazonian seeds supposed to bring luck and fertility...well, I seem to have the latter, so perhaps if I wear them I'll get the former. It was nice just hanging out and doing girly stuff, something I don't really get the chance to do and chat with such a good friend.
It was only when I came back that I realised how tired I am. I managed half an hour at the gym and then got distracted and bought a couple of t-shirts from a shop on the way home that are big enough to cover my growing bump. I was supposed to be going out to watch a film made by a visiting journalist about Guatemala, but think I need to just take it easy tonight.
I tried to speak with Jon and he was about to have dinner and have just called him back, but he's busy upstairs talking with Linda Jo and Alan, the chairman of the Sloop Foundation. I have asked him to have a really good think about what is going to happen over the next few weeks. I know a lot of it is out of his control, but I have decided he needs to make a decision as to when I come to Bermuda. Maybe this is just the rational head that I have on my shoulders today, but I don't want the stress any more of moving without stability.
It therefore doesn't look as though I'll be going to Bermuda in the next few days and think it's probably more likely in a couple of weeks, if indeed at all......ho hum.

The battle between good and evil

As it's the day of the devil today, I should tell you what happened to me in a taxi on the way to see Ollanta Humala, the loser in Sunday's election and the man many in Peru were looking to as a kind of messiah figure.
I should have known I was in for a treat when I got in the taxi and the driver said, 'Good morning, sister'. For the next few minutes, he proceeded to root around in his glove box and various other places in the car, clearly more concerned about finding something than he was about keeping his eyes on the road. I should have known then that he firmly believed that he had God on his side and that gave him an excuse to be a rubbish driver. Then I noticed the book on his dashboard that looked scarily like a Bible and realised that the anodyne tunes from his tape recorder were Spanish religious songs. Then for my treat....he found what he was looking for and put on the Lord's Prayer in English with background music. It lasted precisely five seconds before I asked him to put on the radio and he said....'Pero, Senorita, no le gusta'....No, senor, no me gusta...I am in a stinky mood and I certainly don't want the Lord's Prayer shoved down my throat at 8.40 in the morning.
Zeta rock and pop...the best of the 80s was a much better option, even though it seemed he turned it up to punish me. I thought I had escaped the manic music-loving missionary, but apparently not. He asked me where I was from. Asked me if I believed in God and then started telling me how God would make everything better. He didn't seem to take the hint when I told him I couldn't hear him above the music and when I kept staring out the window with a frown on my face. He really was hard work......
Perhaps I was being punished. The president-elect Alan Garcia had organised a press conference for the 'enviados especiales' -- or the correspondents who had been sent especially to cover the elections, so many of those of us who are long-term enviados especiales felt we couldn't go. Instead, we had been invited to hear Ollanta Humala speak and we were hoping that he would finally put us out of our misery and end the debate as to whether or not he had conceded. An hour later, we decided to leave. Apparently, the campaign team of Humala is somewhat fragmented and couldn't decide what to do, so he didn't show up....perhaps he was scared. Either way, many of us were quite frustrated when we found out some people based in Peru had gone to the Alan press conference and we had nothing.....well, that will teach me to abide by the rules on the day of the devil.
I went to the cinema again last night with Sally and Mary and we saw 'The Girl with the Pearl Earring'. I thought it was very good and really thought the tension was good and it was very well-done in an arty British kind of way.
I am trying to decide whether or not to go to Bermuda this weekend. I have a ticket, although apparently it can be changed for a small fine. I was initially supposed to be going at the end of June, but had decided to go this weekend, to be with Jon and so I didn't feel so out of the loop. Well, I had a rather unsatisfactory chat with him yesterday, during which he told me that he hadn't managed to find anywhere for us to stay. I think there was a bit of a misunderstanding -- probably quite easy on the Peru-Bermuda phone lines and he had assumed if he got the kitchen ship-shape (excuse the pun) in the building where we may be living then we could live in the other house, which hasn't been renovated yet. Well, that would mean sharing a bathroom with a guy who has been bunking in there for several months, who I had been told was moving out...not a nice thought as the bathroom is pretty nasty. We would have out own room and a bed when Jon gets around to buying one. I asked him to make some calls about the possibility of us house-sitting for someone and he has said he will do, although he said that last week.
I feel pretty despondent about this, but wonder if I am being a spoilt brat. I don't think it's unreasonable wanting to go and settle somewhere. Is this damn nesting instinct arriving early.
Before anyone reads into this the wrong thing and assumes Jon and I are having trouble, I want to set your minds at rest. I think with this kind of uncertainty, many couples would have their days when they need to release a bit of steam. It's hard. I had hoped it was going to get easier and I do hope to be with him soon, but think it may well be easier if I wait a little while here in Peru. At least my friends are here and I have my own bathroom. Plus my gym membership doesn't run out for a week....and the cinema is cheap. Oh, there is a god. Mr taxi-driver would be very happy with me.

Comeback kid

Well, he did it.....Peruvians have re-elected the devil they know: the former president Alan Garcia. But this is a rather damning indictment of politics here. Most people I have spoken with in the past few days are incredulous that they have been forced to vote for 'el mal menor' or the least bad option after a campaign that has polarised the country more than any in living memory. Some tried to protest by spoiling their ballot papers, frustrated by the fact a country with as much potential as Peru could have as its political candidates two such awful options. Garcia and his cronies say he has changed. For the sake of Peruvians, I hope he has. They remember the food shortages, the spiralling inflation, the fear that they felt every time they left their homes that they might be the target of terrorist violence. And they remember how he gave free rein to members of his party in the public sector and how this cronyism led to massive corruption. Mr Garcia has reinvented himself as a moderate socialist, who says his priorities are sustaining economic growth and helping the dispossessed - the poor majority. Mmmm.....

Front row seat in history

Peruvians will make history tomorrow when they elect a new president: choosing between a political ingenu and a former president.
It's been a beautiful day here - clear blue skies and weather warmer than you'd expect for this time of year. I hope this isn't symbolic of the calm before the storm. There have been predictions of violence during and after the elections, but today the people of Miraflores were going about their lives, apparently without a care in the world.
The cliff-top road was packed with people enjoying the Indian summer and the Larcomar shopping centre, which is perched overlooking the Pacific, had attracted more than its usual share of tourists and Peruvians: the rich who had to foresake their beach houses for the weekend because they have to vote in Lima tomorrow and the poor from the shanty towns who had probably come to escape the oppressive desert heat of the city's outskirts and have a family day out.
I have had an easy day, punctuated by work and visits to my favourite local coffee shop.
I filed an early story for the BBC about the presidential campaign, which has been one of the dirtiest and aggressive many Peruvians remember. Then I had a lovely walk along the cliff-top this morning, bumping into a couple of friends, and then headed back to Starbucks.
After filing another story for tomorrow morning, saying Peruvians were going to the polls, I met up with Dan, once again in Starbucks and we organised our plans for tomorrow.
The day is going to start early, with a visit to one of the main polling stations in Lima, where both of the presidential candidates are going to be voting. The polling stations open at eight and close at four, so within 24 hours we should have a pretty good idea of who will be Peru's president for the next five years.
It's likely to be Alan Garcia, the former president, who is expected to get six or seven percent more than his rival. The electoral body has promised that by Monday 95 percent of the vote will have been counted and many people are saying that the exit polls which are expected at around four tomorrow afternoon will probably be pretty conclusive.
But, one of the big threats to democracy is democracy itself. This country has found itself in a situation where it has two candidates that are both relatively unpopular and many people in Peru say they are so unhappy with the choices that they are going to spoil their ballot papers. That blank vote cannot be counted and even now there are large numbers of people who are apparently undecided or say they don't like either man and they are voting for the one they see as the lesser of two evils.
If the results are closer than predicted, or they are not conclusive, it's quite likely there will be protests - especially in the slightly more rebellious south, where many of Peru's poor live and where Ollanta Humala has his base of support. Both candidates allegedly have groups of militants, so hopefully the police can keep a lid on any unrest.
I may be busy for a while, so for now I am going to go and enjoy myself. Hal and Lorna have invited me out for dinner at a lovely Italian restaurant. Although the sale of booze is banned for several days over the electoral period, it doesn't bother me and it should be a fun evening. I am pretty tired, especially after a relatively late night last night, when there was a party for the journalists at Mary's house, but as I said, I've been taking it easy today.
I'll post again soon.
H
xxx

And pigs might fly.....

June 1st already...and this was the date we had hoped we would have an answer from Bermuda, but that was always going to be as likely as pigs flying past my window now.
So, we wait another month and have to come up with ways to pass the hours, which is not going to be so hard over the next few days as we are in the run-up to Peru's elections.
On Sunday, millions of people in this country will go to the polls to chose between two men who will each have the rather unenviably task of trying to persuade voters that he is the least worst choice. What a situation to be in.
This is a stupendous country, with vast natural resources, with more culture than the United States has in its little finger (pinkie, sorry), but just doesn't seem to be able to get it together politically. Okay, it's not as disastrous as some of its neighbours: Bolivia or Ecuador, but it is amazing how a country that seems to have been progressing relatively smoothly along the democratic path and has an economy that would do most developed countries proud (at least superficially, if you don't count the fact that most of the country are poor despite 5 plus percent economic growth), can have landed itself in this situation.
People are going to have to choose between a former president who almost brought the country to its knees and then fled Peru leaving it racked by debt default, inflation and terrorism, and a nationalist former army officer, Ollanta Humala, who, despite his recent protests to the contrary, seems to have become a puppet of Hugo Chavez. The country is now so fractured that some are predicting there will be violence this weekend.
The current president and the Organisation of American States have criticised the comments by the Venezuelan leader, saying he is interfering, which of course he is, but have pledged that Sunday's elections are going to be 'free and fair'. Well, free and fair to the extent that most Peruvians I have spoken to don't actually want to vote, although they are legally obliged -- and get fined if they don't -- and propose to either ruin their ballot papers or vote for 'el mal menor' (the least worst).
In the past, the south of Peru and the more remote areas of the Andes have been the cradle for insurgency and instability, primarily because these are the Peruvians who feel most left out by economic growth and these are the country's poorest -- effectively forgotten by the elite in Lima. So, these indigenous people are subjugated by the wealthy descendants of the Spanish conquistadors who arrived here 500 years ago...it seems nothing has changed.
I've got quite a lot of work to do over the next few days in the run up to Sunday, so I'll sign off for now. Happy June 1 from Hannah and Bean, who -- by the amount of kicking going on -- I think has been inspired by the advent of the World Cup to become a footballer even before he/she is born. Uncle Al will be proud.....
xxx